The stone that broke
by HolbyCityFan90
Summary: Part 1 - Taras fate is inevitable.. but how far will Jac go to get what she wants?
1. Chapter 1

It was November, and the hospital car park was filled with a low mist, with frost casting its cold shadow over the car windows. Malik was leaving after a busy nightshift, much to his dismay. He stepped out of the sliding doors and pulled up the collar on his black duffle coat, the air he breathed turned to mist as he made his way to the car park. Jac Naylor was making her way in. They quickly exchanged glances and acknowledged each other before turning away and heading their separate ways. As Jac entered the doors she quickly pulled off her scarf, the temperature inside was noticeably warmer than outside, but then it always was – it is a hospital after all.

As she made her way through the foyer her eyes were drawn along the floor at a trail of mud, which carried through to the Café area, where a rather depressed looking Oliver Valentine stood leaning against the counter with a pair of muddy shoes in his hand.

"What are they?" Jac asked as she joined him leaning on the counter, "Skinny Latte" she said to the young girl behind the counter.

"Don't ask" replied Oli.

"Well I am asking" replied Jac bluntly.

Oliver hesitated.. "Well I walked down my stairs this morning to find my entire house has been turned in to a swamp. The pipes have frozen and burst in this weather. Everything is ruined, and I've had to call out emergency plumbers because the water was still flowing, god knows how much that is going to cost me, and to top it off my shift started two hours ago, so, so far my day is not so good"

"So?" exclaimed Jac

"Well thanks for the concern" muttered Oliver

"No you moron, Why the mud?" asked Jac

"Oh these were the only ones that weren't completely sodden. I didn't have time to clean them; I was late enough as it was"

"Hmmm interesting" said Jac

"Why?" questioned Oliver

"No reason, you just seem like a bit of a fairy…I mean I wouldn't have put Oliver Valentine and mud in to the same sentence, you're always too pruned" laughed Jac

"Is that meant to be a compliment?" asked Oliver

"No" Jac replied bluntly. "He's paying" she said to the girl behind the counter as she took her coffee and turned for the lift.

"Oliver nodded with raised eyebrows to the girl as he handed her a £5 note. "Keep the change" he said smiling as he turned to join Jac in waiting for the lift which seemed to take all day.

Jac broke the silence "So, how are you and your lap dog getting on?"

Oliver scowled at her "If you are referring to Dr Lowe then we are getting on fine"

"How do you cope?" she asked

"With what?" he queried

"Well with... it… the lap dog.. She has to be the most annoying F1 I have ever had the displeasure of mentoring"

"She's just keen that's all, it's not always a bad thing" he argued.

"Keen yes I will give her that, but she is a pain in the arse. I don't understand why you choose to spend any more time than necessary with her" stated Jac

"Well we have fun, and we share similar interests… isn't that supposed to be what relationships are based on?" he said bluntly.

"Hmm yes that and trust Dr Valentine, we both know you are no expert in that field, your image has never really been whiter than white in that area has it?" she said as they turned to face the lift door, she waited impatiently for Oliver to press the button.

"This is coming from the infamous Jac Naylor, who has had nearly every doctor in this place… Including me!" he said with a raised eyebrow.

"Point taken" she smiled.

Jac felt she could open up to Oliver more than anyone else in the hospital, she had always had a soft spot for him, and seeing him with Tara was not something she liked. Truth be told she wanted to be with him, and she was going to find a way.

The lift doors drew open, they both took a deep breath before stepping out on to the already bustling ward. Today was going to very busy, it was only 2 days until bonfire night and people were already starting to light up their bonfires and sparklers, much to Jac's dismay.

She headed for her office, leaving Oliver behind to answer the loudly ringing ward phone.

"Darwin" he said as he picked it up, "Yes okay thank you"

He turned round and headed for Jac's office; she was taking off her coat.

"Miss Naylor there are two incoming traumas, an RTA from just down the road" said Oliver

"Why are they sending them up here!?" She argued "you should have said no…"

"I couldn't, they said ED are only running on 20% capacity today for some reason and it's already packed out, and Keller is struggling for beds already. Seems there aren't enough people dying of heart attacks, they think we need occupying I think.."

"Oh well as long as they are in and out.. I'm not having them clogging up my ward. Anyway where is Mr Spence? Why isn't he in on this? She asked

"Don't know" Oliver replied

" Oh well best get going, preferably while wearing the correct footwear?" she said looking at Oliver's feet. He was still shoe-less.

Oliver looked down.. "Ahh yes.." he turned and headed for the locker room,

As he entered he saw Tara buried inside a book in her locker. He crept up behind her and squeezed both of her sides as he shouted 'BOO'

"Je-sus Oli you scared me!" shouted Tara

"Good morning" he said to her as he turned her around to face him in his arms "What were you doing in there?" he asked as he pointed to her locker.

"Oh nothing just looking over some notes" she said as he hugged her tightly.

"I missed you last night.. but you will be glad you didn't stay after the morning I have had.. "

Tara looked at him puzzled.. "Wait until you see the state of my kitchen floor" he said quietly.

Jac opened the door to see Tara stood in Oliver's arms, "Oi Bill and Ben there is work to do you know" she said as they jumped apart, Jac motioning them out of the door.

"I'll explain later" he said as he pecked her on the cheek and grabbed his clean shoes.

"Uchhh" Jac rolled her eyes and stared at Tara as Oliver walked past her out of the door. Tara's eyes immediately dropped to the floor- a little embarrassed. She knew Jac quite well by now but was still intimidated by every look she ever gave her. Jac let the door go just as Tara was about to reach it. She took a step backwards as to not be hit in the face by the returning door. Because of Jac's intrusion, Tara had forgotten that she had left her locker wide open.

Bak out on the ward Jac was dishing out instructions to all of the Doctors and nurses.

"Right I want you Dr Valentine with me, we will be doing initial assessments, and I hope I can trust you Dr Lowe to sort out next of kin for both patients?"

"Yes of course Miss Naylor but wh…" queried Tara

"Good Jump to it everyone" she cut off Tara mid question

Tara turned to Oli – "but what is going on?"

He bent down to tell her.. " There's been an RT…."

"No time to explain Dr Lowe, just take each case as it comes please, like I asked" she said bluntly, addressing Oliver as well she began to explain, "there has been an RTA down Stamford Gate street, one elderly patient, the other has suspected paralysis from the lower back. Quite a nasty bump by all accounts"

Oliver looked at Jac in amazement, how did she find out these things so fast?

"Right I see" said Tara "But why are they sending them up here?"

"Because they think Cardiothoracics aren't of any importance in this place" she said with a sigh. "I'm going to have to cancel my electives for this morning… Where's Jonny? ..come to think of it where's Mo? She should be here by now"

As the words left Jac's mouth, the three of them turned to see Mo and Jonny bursting through the doors with an elderly patient on a trolley.. "Right this is Mr Edwards, he's got swelling of his upper abdomen… his BP's through the roof and…"

Jack jumped in "We need to get him straight down to CT please to find out what is going on" she said as she examined his head. "you see this?" she asked Mo.

"Yes, doesn't look good does it?" Mo replied

"Not from where I'm standing" said Jac quietly, as she removed the pressure bandage off the elderly man's head to reveal a huge deep laceration above his right ear.

The next patient was wheeled through the door

"Bed 4 please" shouted Oli as he grabbed one side of the trolley, Tara took hold of the other. As they walked Oliver removed the blanket which covered the patient's legs. Tara let out a gasp, as Oliver's eyes grew wider.

"Oh my god" said Tara letting go of the trolley as her legs kept her fixed in one place, her hand covering her mouth…


	2. Chapter 2

Jac spotted the panic in Tara, and moved across the ward to take her place. "what have we got here?" she asked Oliver

"Looks like a compound fracture of the Femur in both legs.."

"ahh I see" said Jac, she was very rarely speechless when it came to medicine but this took her a while to get used to, the patients knees were almost to his waist as the bones in his thighs had come through his flesh.

Oliver could see the worry in Jac's eyes and it radiated to him, he nervously began giving the nurses orders for various tests and scans. "Where do we even start?" he murmured quietly to Jac.

She looked him straight in the eye from across the trolley. "We scan him, and we page Mr Hanssen, we're going to need his input. I can't do this by myself" she said slowly.

Oliver nodded. He knew this was a serious case, but his concern shifted when he noticed Tara leaning on the nurses' station desk. Jac noticed his distraction. "Oli, I need you there with me on this" said Jac. Oliver turned back to face her, "Of course… of course I'm focused" he was clearly lying and Jac knew it.

The porters arrived to take their patient down to X-ray, Oliver sneaked away – his concern for Tara was becoming too great, he could tell something wasn't right. As he reached her she was sitting on one of the chairs behind the nurses' station, with her head in her hands, leaning on the desk. He walked up behind her very quietly and placed his hand on her shoulder. "Hey, what's got to you?"

Tara remained in the same position on her black chair. "I'm fine, honestly, I think that patient just got to me a bit that's all"

"Hmm yeah I know what you mean, it is a bit graphic.. To tell you the truth I'm quite excited to see it in theatre. Especially as Mr Hanssen is going to be assisting Miss Naylor, I'm sure it's going to be a few hours though. I might have to bail on lunch though, do you mind?"

Tara didn't answer; she just shook her head slightly. Oliver wasn't satisfied that that was all that was wrong. He slowly spun her chair around so she was facing him. He crouched down so he was nearly at eye level with Tara. Her eyes were closed. "Hey, come on, you'll be fine" he said softly, as he brushed a stray piece of hair back behind her ear. Tara shook her head again, was this the right moment for her to tell him? The words were about to fall from her mouth as Oliver stood up "I'm going to make you a strong cup of tea, I think you're in shock" he said as he disappeared.

As Tara remained seated with her head in her hands, Mr Hanssen appeared on to the ward in his vampire like demeanour. "Dr Lowe are you quite alright?" he asked

She stood up immediately, as if she had just been woken up, "yes of course!" as she did so, her balance elapsed and she stumbled, to be caught by a stunned Oliver who dropped the plastic cup filled with the tea he had just made her. "Tara, there's something wrong here isn't there" he said as he stood her up without letting her go.

"No there isn't, it was that patient, it made me feel a bit queasy that's all". He looked in her eyes clearly still unconvinced. He turned to Hanssen, who was coldly staring at Tara.

"Dr Lowe, I think it's time we had a little chat don't you, maybe Dr Valentine _should_ join us?" he said quietly, with a disappointed look on his face.

Oliver's heart sank, he had known something wasn't right for a while, but he refused to let it get in the way of his and Tara's relationship. "Chat about what?" he asked quietly.

Tara's eyes wandered to the floor.

"I think it would be best if we used Miss Naylors Office" said Hanssen as he motioned them towards the door. Oliver still had hold of Tara, his concern becoming visible to Hanssen as they entered Jac's office.

"Now then take a seat Dr Valentine" said Henrik once he had carefully guided Tara to her chair.

Oliver moved a single waiting room type chair alongside Tara. She glanced at him, pleased he was there to support her, but she knew what he was about to hear was going to crush him, he would be devastated once again, the same pain he felt when he lost Penny, but this time it was her fault, she was going to be the one to hurt him.

She knew that her Tumour was changing and growing, deep down she knew it was not good. She wanted to enjoy the time she had left with Oli, where she felt happiest.

"Now Dr Valentine, for the past 3 months Dr Lowe has been receiving scans to check the activity of her low grade Astrocytoma of the temporal lobe, which I believe is now becoming active and the reason why you are now experiencing excruciating headaches and light headedness.

Tara nodded. "It is" she said in a quiet voice. She looked at Oliver who sat beside her, with his eyes wide open. "I…. I knew it was going to be something bad, but this?" "are you sure?" asked Oliver, who knew it was a stupid question the moment it left his lips.

"Yes I am sure Dr Valentine" replied Hanssen.

"So when do you operate?" asked Oliver.

"Unfortunately in Dr Lowes case it would be impossible to operate, as the tumour is too deep".

Oliver shook his head, as his palms met his face. "This isn't happening" he said to himself.

An abnormal feeling hit him, this shouldn't be happening, he should be on the other side of the table giving this news to a couple of relative strangers.

Tara began to weep; she knew this was the end of the road. She had hoped to finish her training before having to leave but it was obvious that was very unlikely.

Mr Hanssen rose from his chair. "I will leave you two alone, I'm sure you have things you wish to discuss. Take as much time as you need".

Oliver and Tara remained fixed to their chairs, neither of them knowing who would speak first.

Oliver lifted his head to face Tara, as tears fell down his cheeks he did his best to compose himself.

"I just don't know what to say" said Tara through a waterfall of tears. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you…it was so hard… "

Oliver got out of his chair and grasped Tara's head "It doesn't matter now.. I know.. and we can concentrate on getting you better" he said, his tear flow matching hers.

She shook her head. "Oli you heard Hanssen, there's no way they will or even can operate. Besides I don't want them too, my prognosis really isn't good, and I don't want my final days to be in a hospital bed. I want to be outside enjoying life… with you if you can stay with me"

He didn't have to answer; he hugged her tightly, as she gripped him tightly back. "Thank you" she said. "I love you Tara" said Oliver still crying. "I love you to Oli, I just wish we had more time" replied Tara.

"I don't want to know this answer really, but do you know how long you have got?" Oliver asked with a heavy heart.

"Well Hanssen said if it had stayed inactive I could have lived the rest of my life normally, but if it became active, it could be a matter of weeks"

Oli took a sharp intake of breath and hugged her harder.

"I'm not going to be able to stay here in work, Hanssen took a risk on having me here anyway"

Oliver nodded in agreement. I'm going to take some leave. "The time we have left, we can't let it go."

"Promise me you will stay with me until the end?" Tara asked reluctantly.

"Of course, but you can't think like that. There could still be a chance".

"No Oli, don't think like that, we have to face this, I'm not going to get better, we need to be prepared".

They stayed in each other's embrace, until Jac walked in to her office.

"Sorry but what the hell is going on in here?! We've got patients out there who need treating… you know what you are PAID for." She exacted.

"Miss Naylor I…."

"NO I don't want to hear it, you know I've had it with you two. If you are going to remain an item I'm going to have one of you transferred" Shouted Jac staring at Tara. It was then she notices that she had clearly been crying.

"Oh go what is it now? Did you lose your pen again?" exclaimed Jac. She turned to face Oliver, who she could see had also been crying. Jac slowly realised she may have just over stepped the mark.

"Okay, is somebody going to tell me what's going on?"

Tara left the office. Her fear of Jac had now disappeared, given what she was facing, and felt no impulsion to stay to explain.

Jac stood behind her desk open mouthed as Tara left. "What is it Oli?".. he remained in silence, he couldn't find the words to say it because he was still trying to understand it all himself.

"Okay let me guess….. Your cheating on her…. No… she's cheating on you… no that's not right… she's pregnant?...my god that would be an annoying child..."

"SHES DYING JAC" Oliver shouted.


	3. Chapter 3

"She's dying and there's nothing I can do about it" Oliver wept, as Jac looked on with an uncommon look in her eye – it was hurting her to see Oliver like this.

"Oliver I'm so sorry" said Jac sympathetically

"Don't, just don't… please…I can't take it. How can I lose her? She's the one good thing in my life.. I saw a future together with her… I was going to ask her to move in with me for god sake.."

Jac knew she had to put her feelings aside, he was hurting, and the only way he would get over this was for him to spend as much time as possible with Tara now. "Why don't you ask her? Just because she has a tumour doesn't mean she can't live normally for a while… It might be good… give you both something positive to focus on"

Oliver shrugged.

"Look Oli her family aren't here, she won't be able to cope by herself for too much longer. She's going to need help. What if she goes back to her family before she becomes incapable? You won't get any time at all"

"Suppose your right. I just thought when we did do it, it would have been a happier time.. you know…I just can't get my head around it. She's probably not going to see Christmas this year. I just can't process that. Life without Tara won't be worth anything"

Jac moved closer to him, and pulled him in to a tight embrace. "You know Oli, I'll always be here for you… no matter what… you know that yes?"

"Yes.." he looked Jac in the eyes "Thanks Jac" he gave her a half-hearted smile which she returned.

"Now go and tell her to and pack….. and don't take no for an answer!" she shouted as he left her office.

Jac couldn't get the feeling of jealousy out of her head… but why?! Tara was a dying woman…and she was jealous that she would get to spend her days with Oliver. "Have I given him the right advice?" she asked herself. She returned to her chair to think about what she had just done.. if Tara went back to her family now, Oliver would be able to move on.. to her, and she could be the one spending the time with him. Jac dismissed the thought, "Even I can't do that" she thought to herself.

A loud knock on the door brought Jac back to reality. "Come in" she shouted. Jonny entered, "do you know what's up with loves young dream out there?" he asked as he made his way over to her desk. "Yes… I suppose you will find out sooner or later"

Jonny looked puzzled

"Dr Lowe has a brain tumour" she allowed him a few seconds to process the thought, "obviously she will no longer be working, and Dr Valentine will be taking some time off too"

Jonny was stunned, for a few minutes he was unable to find any words.

"Whys Oliver having time off, is it to support her through her treatment?" He asked

"No.. It's been decided that there aren't any more treatment routes we can take.. Its sitting too deep. Hansens worried he will do more damage trying".

"Jesus" was all he could manage

"So what did you want anyway?" Jac asked

"Oh…it doesn't matter"

"No.. go on tell me.." Jac insisted

"Well… I just wanted to see if you fancied some afternoon delights this afternoon?.. But given the circumstances.. Don't worry" he said as he turned to leave

"No, that's fine, I'll meet you in the cupboard in say what 20 minutes?"

"Okay" he smiled as he left Jacs office.

"Sorry Jonny" said Michael as he rushed past in to Jacs office

"Jac we need you out here.. It's Mr Edwards, he's gone in to Cardiac arrest"

She stood up and ran out of her office quickly tying up her long hair.

Oliver reached for his grey sweatshirt in his locker and put it on, noticing Tara's locker door slightly ajar, his curiosity got the better of him and he had to look. Inside he found a book, the one Tara had been reading only a short while ago. He pulled it out, and the title shouted at him "Astrocytoma's and their effects" It became clear as he rummaged through her locker, that Tara was well aware of what her tumour was doing to her.. then it hit him, the day she fainted in the locker room, her headaches, it all made sense, why hadn't she told him though? he wondered. He neatly tidied them away and closed her door.

He made his way to the front entrance of the hospital.. the benches outside were always a good place to clear your head. As the doors opened he noticed Tara sitting on top of one, she was on her mobile. He made his way over as he zipped up his hoodie, you could certainly tell it was November as ice frost formed on the grass.

He made his way to the bench and sat beside Tara.

She acknowledged him, and continued her conversation to her mother. "I'll see you soon yes?, okay bye, bye"

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Tara eventually broke it

"I'm going to go home, back to Guangdong" she announced quietly.

"No, you can't, I promised I would be with you until the end"

"I know but my mum wants me at home, with my family, she thinks we should all be together"

"Yes but what about me?" He immediately felt selfish as his eyes hit the ground

"Oli, I've thought about this, she's right, and it's not fair on me asking you to take on so much, I won't let you become my… well my nurse!" she quietly argued

"It wouldn't be like that, you know it wouldn't. I was going to ask you to come and live with me, even before all of this, I was going to ask you, as my girlfriend, to move in with me"

She smiled at him, as he looked so helpless. "Oli it's a lovely thought, but I can't, I won't put this on you. It's time for you to move on with your life".

"But you are my life" he said as he fought back tears

"Oli….." she pulled him closer, "I love you, but I have to do this, it's not just us we have to think about"

"I know.. " he replied reluctantly.

As they sat in each other's embrace Oliver's pager began to beep. He rooted in his pocket and pulled out the noisy box. "they are taking the compound fracture patient in to theatre" he said.

"You should go…" said Tara

"I'd rather stay here" he replied.

"Come on, go… I'm going to head off now anyway, there's loads of stuff I need to sort out"

He reluctantly let go of her hand as he stood up to walk away, he turned and kissed her lightly, "I'll see you later then?" he asked

"Yeah sure" she smiled.

Hands in his pockets, he headed for the entrance doors to the hospital. Just as he was about to walk through the door, he heard someone shout.

"CAN I HAVE SOME HELP HERE PLEASE"

He turned on his heels to see a young man kneeling over what looked like a woman lying face down on the ground. His gut hit him hard, it was Tara


	4. Chapter 4

"Tara" whispered Oliver

"Tara!" He shouted as he ran towards the elderly gentleman who had seen Tara fall.

"I think she tripped.. Must have knocked herself clean out" stuttered the elderly man.

"No…no..no this can't be happening.. not now' muttered Oliver to himself as he knelt beside Tara, checking her vital signs.

"I think she'll be alright my lad, don't worry too much" smiled the elderly man.

"No I don't think she will be' said Oliver as he looked the man straight in the eye, his filling up with cold tears as he spoke.

"I'll go fetch some more help" Said the gentleman as he got up and stuttered away.

Oliver kept talking to Tara. He knew this wasn't good, and he might not have long left.

"Tara come on… please don't do this to me" he whimpered tears streaming down his face. He began cpr as he had no response.

"Oliver!"

He recognized the familiar voice but didn't make any attempt to look over at Sacha as he approached, he continued compressions on Tara's chest, with each one his determination to bring her back increased, but the voice in his head was telling him it was useless. He knew she will have suffered from a intracerebral haemorrhage.

There was nothing that could be done, this was the end of Tara's road.

"Oh my god it's Tara" said Sacha as he knelt down besides Oliver..

Chrissie arrived shortly behind, and was helpless as she watched the two men try to revive Tara

"Oliver let me take over" Said Sacha as he placed his hand on Olivers arm

"No!" shouted Oliver as he kept counting, pushing Sacha away.

Sacha felt helpless, he could only watch as he saw the pain in Oliver's eyes. He put himself in his shoes, what if this were Chrissie, he would do the same, that one extra compression might just bring her back.

As minutes passed, Sacha knew there was nothing more that could be done.

"Oliver" he said gently

"I think we should call it a day"

"No..No I wont give up on her" panted Oliver as he kept his intense compressions going on Tara's lifeless body.

"Come on" said Chrissie from behind him

"No!, you don't understand, I can't lose her" his vision now completely impaired by his tears.

"Oliver… mate, leave her be now" whispered Sacha

Oliver took a deep breath, as he looked t Tara's lifeless body. He fell backwards and hugged his knees.

"I thought we'd have longer than an hour!" cried Oliver.

By now there was Sacha, Chrissie and several paramedics who had been dropping a patient off and saw the problem all huddled around Tara's lifeless body.

"Time of death, 3.36pm" said Sacha

"No, no no no no", Oliver sat crying to himself.

Chrissie felt tears prick in her eyes as she crouched beside him pulling him in to a tight hug. Oliver let go of his legs and wrapped himself around Chrissie tightly. Sacha gave Chrissie an encouraging smile as he helped the paramedics move Tara on to a trolley.

"Come on now, let's get you inside" whispered Chrissie in to Oliver's ear.

He stood up besides her, clinging on to her hand as he watched Tara being wheeled towards the hospital entrance in a black body bag.

Not being able to face it he turned to face the ice-cold shrubbery, which lay behind them, wiping his tears away on the sleeve of his hoodie.

Chrissie stayed with him for reassurance. "What happened Oli?" she reluctantly asked.

"She was ermm…" Oliver fought back tears "She was on the bench, then on the floor.. I didn't see what happened in-between. I should never have left her, I should still be with her now".

"But why was she out here?, it was the middle of her shift?"

"It still is" he replied. "She should still be in there working, not in a body bag" he couldn't say anymore without tears choking him.

Chrissie gripped his hand tightly.

Jac approached the front doors to the hospital. She was worried about Oliver now he had been missing for over an hour. She placed her foot on the bottom step and turned the corner, to be faced with a teary eyed Sacha walking sadly towards her. This was not the usual Sacha she knew and loved.

"Sacha what's wrong?" pleaded Jac, she noticed the trolley with the black bag placed on top. The paramedics continued as Sacha stopped to speak to Jac.

"Sacha?" Jac said with a slight panic in her voice. She knew this was not going to be good news for her, had Oliver done something stupid?

He looked her in the eye, "It's Dr Lo…. I'm afraid she collapsed outside. Must have hit her head, some sort of internal bleed, post mortem will tell us more" He squeezed Jac's shoulders and pulled her in to a hug.

'Shit. I didn't think it would be that fast." Replied Jac.

"What would be?" queried Sacha

"She had an Astrocytoma of the temporal lobe, size of a grapefruit by all accounts" replied Jac with a sigh.

"Oh god…" said Sacha.

"Poor Oliver" he remembered the expression on his face as he tried his hardest to revive her.

"Where is he?" Jac said with great concern

"He's out there, Chrissie's with him"

Jac nodded, "I'm going to go and see him"

Sacha replied with a nod and a halfhearted smile.

"Ill see you later" said Sacha, as he watched Jac walk out of the hospital doors.

The cold air hit Jac hard. She scanned the large grassy area at the front of the building. It was winter, nearly 4pm, and the light was beginning to fade. She managed to make out the silhouette of two people standing behind the bench, neat the shrubbery. She made her way over with her hands in the pockets of her hoodie. It was Chrissie and Oliver. As she grew closer, she noticed the pain in Oliver's eyes and it hurt her. Chrissie gave her a warm smile, and a nod, as she left Jac with a frail Oliver.

"Oli….i…" She didn't know what to say. She had never found herself in this situation before.

He looked back at her with empty eyes. Her instinct told her to hug him tightly and not let go. So she did, they stood in each other's embrace for what seemed like hours.

Jac broke the embrace, "I think we should go inside. You're going to catch hypothermia out here"

"I don't care," stated Oliver slowly and lifelessly.

"Well I do, I don't want you freezing out here. Come on lets go in"

"No, I can't go in there. Not again." Refused Oliver

"What do you mean?" questioned Jac

"After Penny, everyone being so shifty and sad around me. I couldn't take it again. Not now" he said.

Jac nodded. She knew he was right; everyone would be consoling him, coping with it his or her own ways.

"I'm going to go home," He stated.

"By yourself?" questioned Jac

Oliver nodded in reply.

"Well no, I'm not having that. I'll come with you".

"Jac please, I want to be alone"

"Not a chance, I'm not leaving you alone like this. God knows what you will do," Jac pronounced.

"Really, I'll be fine"

"Oliver this isn't up for discussion" she demanded.

She pulled out her mobile, and sent a text message. Luckily Mr Hope had showed up at the right time, and stood in for Jac in theatre. She couldn't concentrate in there not knowing where Oliver was.

She text

"_I'm taking Oli home, I'm not leaving him alone like this, can you let Mr Hanssen know when he comes out of theatre please, thanks Jac x" _

She scrolled through the names and stopped on Michael Spence. She knew he was the one most likely to have his phone switched on. Placing her phone back in her pocket, she took hold of Oliver's ice-cold hand and pulled him towards the awaiting taxis on the road.


	5. Chapter 5

He stood lifeless in the Taxi bay, while Jac motioned one over.

She didn't know what to say to him, so they stood in silence, Jac stared at the ground as the Taxi approached.

"Come on Oliver" she exhaled as she tugged his arm as they got in to the black cab.

The journey was a silent one. Oliver didn't look like he wanted to talk, and Jac wondered if she knew what she would say to him if he did.

The darkness had fallen over Holby, and the streetlights shone through the taxi window as it grew to a stop outside Oliver's house. Jac rummaged for some change in the pocket of her hoodie. Luckily she had just enough, she handed it to the driver, and got out. Oliver did not move from his frozen position. He glanced at Jac on the pavement and slowly shuffled over to the other side of the seat where the open door waited. He stepped out on to the cold pavement, as Jac closed the door behind him.

"Do you have Keys Oli?" asked Jac quietly and sympathetically

"Errrrm..I.. yes I think so.. " he replied in a slow motion like manner as he dug deep in the back pocket of his jeans, pulling out a single key attached to a photo of him and Tara together. Jac took the key off Oliver, looking at the photo as she found the key hole in the door, a wave of sadness hit her. He was going to take this very badly, she could sense it. The key fitted perfectly in to the hole, as the door clicked and opened. She turned and took hold of Oliver's hand, gently pulling him inside.

The house was a mess, and then Jac remembered Oliver's words at the start of their shift about a pipe bursting due to the bad weather.

Oliver moved out of the hallway and in to the large living room. Nearly everything was soaked; he picked up a cushion and hugged it tightly, while looking around the rest of the ruined room.

Jac watched him for a few moments, out of the corner of her eye she spotted a note stuck to the kitchen door, she moved down the long hallway and pulled the note. It was off the repair man:

_Dear Mr Valentine,_

_We managed to fix the leak but I'm afraid you will have to replace all of your appliances due to water damage. We have also had to cut the power from the sockets in the whole house – you will need to find a qualified electrician to sort it. We will drop your invoice round next week. _

_Many Thanks_

_Bill_

"Great" Jac thought to herself.

"Look Oli, you can't stay here, you've got no electric, we can go to mine come on".

"No… I…I should stay here and clean up. This place isn't going to sort itself out" he said as he glanced at the floor. He noticed something shining on the sodden carpet. He bent down to pick it up, it was Tara's bracelet he gave her for their first anniversary. He traced his fingers over the shining silver and smiled. He turned to face Jac "she wore this every day until two days ago, we were playing Twister" he said with a single chuckle. "I caught it with my big toe and broke the clasp, I'm taking it to the jewellers in town to be repaired".

Jac returned the smile. "Come on, I need a latte and there's no hope of making one here"

Oliver nodded, "yeah okay". His car was still on the driveway as they used Tara's car for work journeys when they were on the same shifts.

"Where are your car keys?" requested Jac

"I'll get them" he replied

Jac motioned him out of the room; he followed her like a lamb.

Taking the keys off the sideboard, Oliver turned to look around at his ruined home. "What's the point?" he asked

"The point in what?" Jac replied

"Cleaning this up. It's never going to be the same again, never a happy home"

"Of course it will be. It won't take much. Plus, please don't go all soppy on me, I don't know how to handle it" Jac said with a small smile, which was not returned – she wondered if he had heard her. "Come on, I'll drive" said Jac as she pulled the car keys out of his hand.

…...

"Poor Oliver", said Chantelle with her usual sad face, as she leant on the nurses' station.

"Hmm I know, were he and Dr Lo an item?" asked Digby in his usual puzzled manner. He was only really paying her half attention as he looked at some scans on the computer screen.

"Duhh yes of course.. and they were so cute together. It's such a shame, Oliver must be going through hell, I mean this must bring back terrible memories of when Penny died"

"Penny?"

"His sister, she was a doctor here too, she went out with Mr Spence to an accident, climbed under a train and never came back., it must be a horrible reminder for him. Maybe we should do something, like a memorial, or start a collection"

"I think that may be a bit soon, I mean she only passed away a few hours ago. Maybe leave it a little while. It's a nice thought though" Said Digby in a reassuring tone.

Chantelle returned a small smile. "We could at least meet for a drink later, you know to remember her"

"Yes.. yes we could". Digby replied as he cleared his throat and suddenly decided to pay more attention. He had been building up the confidence to ask Chantelle out for a drink for a while, this sounded good. "ahem, it would be good for me and err.. you to drink to Tara, you know to remember her"

"Yes" she smiled, looking relatively pleased with herself, I'll see if I could round up some of the others, I'm sure they'll want to come" she said as she hurried away gripping patient files.

"ahh.." said Digby, his idea of him and Chantlle sharing a bottle of wine in the bar dissolved fast.

…...

Leaning on the doorframe Jac sipped her freshly brewed latte, and looked on at Oliver peacefully sleeping on her sofa. Her phone buzzed in her pocket. Pulling it out she noticed the name, it was Michael Spence.

"Hello?" she answered

"Jac, Hi it's Michael, look I got your message. How is he?" he asked

"I'm not sure, it's hard to tell. He's snoring on my sofa at the moment, poor sod"

"Look Jac, there's something we need to discuss, he can't hear you can he?"

"No he's asleep"

"Just take yourself out of the room for a second. I don't want him knowing any of this yet"

"Okay hold on" replied Jac as she moved in to the kitchen, closing the door behind herself

"Go on" she demanded

"They did the post mortem on Tara, turns out it was her head, but that's not the worst thing"

"Why, what's wrong?" she asked worriedly

"They realised Tara was pregnant before they did it. I'm guessing it's Oliver's, but I don't think she'd told him"

"Oh shit. He really doesn't need this on top of everything Michael, do we tell him?"

"We're gonna have to, Jac the kid's still alive. She was being taken down to the morgue, but the acting consultant signing her certificate noticed something, so they put her back on a ventilator"

"But we stopped resuss? She was dead Michael"

"Yeah but only for a matter of minutes, they put her on the ventilator and took the baby"

"Why how far was she?"

"About 27 weeks according to her notes"

"And Oliver doesn't know? Surely not, he's not that stupid and I'm sure his medical knowledge would have helped him out a bit"

"Well I certainly didn't notice, did you?, she covered this well Jac" said Michael

"So is it still alive?" she asked

"Yeah, she is. But only just. I'm gonna go down now and see if I can help, I'll let you know the situation in a while, but you should tell him, this could be good for him".

Jac took a deep breath; this was a lot to take in.

"Yeah okay, I'll do it now. Let me know how it.. I mean she is"

They hung up the phones; Jac plucked up the courage and made her way back to the living room, back to the peaceful looking Oliver. She couldn't help but think his life was so simple six hours ago, now it somewhat resembled a pretty horrific car crash.


End file.
